My cousin John attempted to commit suicide yesterday. Why I have no idea. I guess I kind of do. Depression. I know that feeling all too well. I've struggled with it my entire life. It's not something you share with other people. Nobody else understands. Or so it seems.
Anyways, John is in ICU. He is breathing on his own thank God after being on the ventilator all last night.
His sister Kate is in rehab for drinking. I'm worried about how she will take this. She really is too delicate. She pretends to be tough, but she always drank to forget all her problems and that isn't tough. That's chicken. I know she'll probably try to blame herself for what John did and I worry a lot about that. Right now I'm just glad they won't let her out of the center by herself because I know she'd fall apart.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
Just ANGRY
Have you ever been so angry that you just couldn't think of what to do, whether to shake, or to cry or to just sit startled?
See, I guess I've been a member of pregnancy.org since April 2006 right about the time I got pregnant with Patrick. About a year and a half later another site sprouted up known as Journey thru motherhood.... And that's really where this story begins.
I've made a lot of friends over there. Friends that I didn't have on pregnancy.org, two girls in particular, or so I thought.
Maybe no so much as I thought. I don't know.
I digress. A few days ago R.R. sent me a message saying she was leaving JTM. Okay, I dind't know why but I respected that. I told her I would miss her and that I missed the other girls who had stopped posting there as well.
She said that most the girls she knew who had quit posting there were insulted that no one had noticed they were gone and that no one seemed to care.
Well today I posted kind of a joke thread with their names asking them to check in and to do it now. No excuses. I guess you can't really read sarcasm over the internet too well, and that's one of my major problems.
They didn't take it as a joke. They took it as an insult. Then to add insult to injury one of the girls came out with a Private Message that I had sent her. That's not meant for public eyes. That's why it's called private.
So I basically told them that I was really upset that they took it that way and obviously I was insulted and that I was definitely taking a break. The problem is, right now I'm not sure if it's a break or a permanent leave.
I'm just insulted, I'm hurt, and I feel like my trust was broken.
I thought most these girls were friends. I was wrong. And now I feel lost.
See, I guess I've been a member of pregnancy.org since April 2006 right about the time I got pregnant with Patrick. About a year and a half later another site sprouted up known as Journey thru motherhood.... And that's really where this story begins.
I've made a lot of friends over there. Friends that I didn't have on pregnancy.org, two girls in particular, or so I thought.
Maybe no so much as I thought. I don't know.
I digress. A few days ago R.R. sent me a message saying she was leaving JTM. Okay, I dind't know why but I respected that. I told her I would miss her and that I missed the other girls who had stopped posting there as well.
She said that most the girls she knew who had quit posting there were insulted that no one had noticed they were gone and that no one seemed to care.
Well today I posted kind of a joke thread with their names asking them to check in and to do it now. No excuses. I guess you can't really read sarcasm over the internet too well, and that's one of my major problems.
They didn't take it as a joke. They took it as an insult. Then to add insult to injury one of the girls came out with a Private Message that I had sent her. That's not meant for public eyes. That's why it's called private.
So I basically told them that I was really upset that they took it that way and obviously I was insulted and that I was definitely taking a break. The problem is, right now I'm not sure if it's a break or a permanent leave.
I'm just insulted, I'm hurt, and I feel like my trust was broken.
I thought most these girls were friends. I was wrong. And now I feel lost.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
